Yesterday was my birthday and I am feeling reflective about the past year. On the cover this year appears to have been quite ordinary, but on closer inspection, this year has been a type of turning point for me.
For starters, at some point this year, I woke up and realized that well, I hated where my career was going and I needed to start pursuing something I actually cared about. In realizing that, came the realization that I was unhappy in other areas of my life as well. I was turning into an uptight, emotionally vacant, unadventurous, uninspired person.
Then my mom got diagnosed with breast cancer, yep the C word, and everything just suddenly became clear. I had already decided to quit my job and ironically enough was doing just that as my mom was at the doctor getting that awful diagnosis. I was the first person called and I left my meeting to be with her. For the last month I have witnessed Cancer from the diagnosis, to the surgery, to the radiation with the possibility of chemo, to the emotional upheaval. I am happy to report that my mom is doing better, this is not a death sentence and the odds are good that she won’t even need chemo.
But what came out of this year for me is the simple recognition that life is too short. I realized that I am only here on this earth for a limited time – it could end anytime from anything and what have I been most proud of? Well, actually nothing up until now.
The thing is I have always had a plan. I always knew where I was going and how I was going to get there. But maybe that is not the best way for me. I think I may have missed some things by staying on track, and now I want to stop and see things, explore things and really live in the moment.
This blog started out detailing my journey from “rat racer” to freelance writer, but I am learning there is so much more to it than that. This is my journey to find myself. Leaving my full time job to be a freelance writer was just the beginning.
Since quitting my job, and I have actually quit (my last day is July 10th), the whole world has just seemed to open up. There is so much possibility, and so much I want to do, try, and experience. It’s hard sometimes to even know where to start. I know I must continue to make a living, but I also know now that I must make the most out of every moment and really focus on living life.
I have high hopes for this next year of my life, anything and everything is possible. I hope to detail my next year here on this blog, and I hope to inspire others to live their life to the fullest too.